Category: Health
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Codependency and Narcissists: Let’s Make Something Go Right! (Part II)
In Part I, we discussed how the codependent is a perfect victim for the narcissists. We discussed our working definition of codependency: a system of distortions that exists on a continuum. Codependents learn personality traits that interfere with knowing themselves self and others. Codependents take care of others, often ignoring or tolerating their abuse, avoiding…
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Codependency and Narcissists: What Could Possibly Go Wrong? (Part I)
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For this discussion, we are going to stick with our understanding of codependency as a system of distortions that exists on a continuum. Codependents learn personality traits that interfere with knowing themselves self and others. The people-pleasing aspect of codependency might drive the ignoring of who we are trying to please. The focus of wanting…
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Common Sense Tools for the Friend of Someone Who is Brainwashed!
Most of us know or have known someone we care about who has come under the influence of a perpetrator using him/her for self-serving purposes. Very smart, educated, healthy people can, for some unknown, reason come under the spell of opportunistic, toxic, and insecure people. It is very puzzling for an observer of this phenomena…
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Codependency and Contentious Times (Part II)
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In Part I, we identified some areas of concern for the codependent during these contentious times. Now let’s look at some possible tools for the codependent to use. If you haven’t done your codependent work, now is the perfect time to begin. With social media, you can practice taking a stand for what is important…
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Codependency and Contentious Times – Part I
Probably the one area we can all agree is the idea that “these are contentious times.” What do contentious times in our country (if not the world), mean to the codependent? First let’s go back to our definition of codependency: Codependency is learned personality traits that negatively affect knowing one’s self and others. Codependents become dependent…
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Codependent or Loving? Part II
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Remember our question from Part One: How do I know if I am acting codependent or loving? Also, let’s review our definitions of “codependent” and “loving”: Love: An intense feeling of deep affection. For the purpose of this article, we will include some more distinctions of love: Brave Kind Trusting Codependency: Codependency, for the purpose of this…
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The Underbelly of Being Nice
Why do people fight so hard to be sweet, nice, and accommodating, rather than honest, genuine, and authentic? It is a great question. Cultures are set up and rewards are given if you follow the rules: always say yes, agree to everything, be nice, don’t rock the boat, and tell people things you think will…
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What Our Athletes Can Teach Us About Recovery!
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Last summer 2016 in particular, we had some pretty spectacular athletic competitions in England, France, and more recently, Rio. Whether you follow cycling, tennis or any of the competitions that took place in Rio, it is hard not to be inspired and learn from some of the stories. Stories and Goals First, all athletes come with…
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How to Get the Best Out of Your 12-Step Meeting!
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Attending a support group can be a very positive part of your recovery plan, as long as you understand what is healthy and what is dysfunctional. Let’s look at a few qualities of support groups and what happens when things get out of balance… Similarities vs Enmeshment When I join a support group and find…
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Recovery With a Capital R!
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Recovery is not something you just fall into because you stopped your addiction. It is imperative that you view Recovery as Active, Alive, Constantly Changing, a Verb…and something you never take for granted. Yes; there are simplistic things you can do (e.g. eat healthy, exercise, attend meetings, avoid triggers, go to work), but unless you really…