Category: Marriage
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My Spouse Has Borderline Personality Disorder!
When your spouse has a Borderline Personality Disorder (BP), whether it’s a sudden realization or a long-known fact, it can be challenging. Those in relationships with BP individuals may be subject to unique forms of manipulation or toxicity. Recognizing these habits of BP is the first step to liberation. I will address different toxic tools here…
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Healing From A Borderline Spouse
Stay or Leave? When I wrote about healing from the Narcissist, I used the paradigm that the spouse had physically left the marriage. Today we are going to address physically staying or leaving but always with the goal of emotionally leaving the emotional abuse of the spouse with borderline personality disorder (BP). I believe a…
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The Abusive Marriage – What Happened to Me?
In order to heal from an abusive marriage, it is important to understand what happened. The following are some scenarios and tactics of the perpetrator used to keep you under his/her thumb. See if you can identify any you recognize and let’s see if we can unravel this abusive puzzle. The first scenario will be…
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5 Signs You Are In An Abusive Marriage
1. Physical Abuse In theory, in this country, no one can touch you as adults in any way (physically or sexually) without your permission. At the horrendous end of the spectrum of physical abuse are the stories we hear about the beating, burning, rape, mutilation, sex slaves, etc. and at the lesser end of the…
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Guidelines for Determining Toxic Relationships
Should I leave my relationship? This question is probably one of the top ten reasons people have come into my practice asking for help. I am a therapist who prefers to work preventatively. I would like someone who is in the market for a relationship to already be in therapy. A good therapist can evaluate…
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Say No to Abusive Relationships Forever!
Unfortunately, when you grow up with emotional or physical abuse your body can wire love and abuse together and it thinks that is normal. Some people who grew up with abuse have the ability and resilience to say NEVER again. Often we find if there was one person who provided unconditional love the child can…
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Sex and Codependents: What Could Possibly Go Wrong?
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So many women I interviewed when writing my book reported saying yes to sex just to get the sex over with and have the person go away. Others reported saying yes to sex to have the person like them. Others reported gaining weight so they wouldn’t have to say no to dating and sex. Many…
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Codependent or Loving? Part II
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Remember our question from Part One: How do I know if I am acting codependent or loving? Also, let’s review our definitions of “codependent” and “loving”: Love: An intense feeling of deep affection. For the purpose of this article, we will include some more distinctions of love: Brave Kind Trusting Codependency: Codependency, for the purpose of this…
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Codependent or Loving? Part I
How do I know if I am acting codependent or loving? This is an excellent question and often confusing for many for different reasons. Let’s look at the definitions of codependent and loving and see what we find. Love: An intense feeling of deep affection. For the purpose of this article, we will include some distinctions of love: Truth Strong…
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Infidelity in Your Marriage Stage II
In our first article or what we will call Stage I of Infidelity in your Marriage, we discussed the challenges of confirming the infidelity, the boundary I recommend you set and then two possibilities that can result from that boundary. Now we are going to explore Stage II with both scenarios that we addressed in…
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